English roast-beef cannot be compared to American roast-beef - it is so superior.
We think that curry is very good and necessary on the borders of the Ganges River - but not on the Hudson or thereabouts.
Muffins, and other cakes or pastes, served warm are very bad for the stomach and teeth.
Opossum, otter, raccoon, skunk, fox, woodchuck, and other like animals: we cannot say that we have had much experience in cooking the above animals.
Frogs: the hind legs only are used as food. Take the hind-legs of fifty well-skinned green frogs, put them in cold water then simmer on the fire for about four hours.
Tstchy soup: put four pounds of beef into a soup-kettle (the poorer classes always use mutton) with a chicken or a duck, pork, sausages and vegetables. Cover with fish broth and a head of cabbage and simmer for about three hours.
As everyone knows and none of us find it easy to admit, putting on weight comes from eating too much. My mother was big - she told herself she had ‘large bones’. I was fatter when I was young. I ate huge amounts of ..well, almost everything.
Now I cook a lot, never eat while I’m doing it, but I’m tempted to snack when I’m relaxing in the evenings. So here are a few thoughts which might make it easier to stay out of the kitchen:
1. Brush your teeth after dinner - you’ll be less likely to peek in the fridge for something to eat while you’re watching television
2. Bellringing. A friend who has taken up church bellringing says that the arm action and general exercise has helped her lose pounds
3. Be generous - give away cake, muffins or chocolates that you happen to have around
4. Read a book on a Kindle - you’ll be less likely to eat while you’re doing it because you can’t click to turn the pages if your hands are sticky with chocolate or cake crumbs.
A zillion people out there are would-be writers. Altucher tells them why they should go the self publishing route. I’ve tried it and it works. But it’s rather like finding a cure to a chronic disease: the medicine might have some effect at first but it doesn’t solve the problem long term. In the same way, it’s easy to get a book on Amazon and Kindle. You don’t need an agent, an editor or a pesky publisher who keep saying ‘not for us’. But when you’ve done it…. what next? It’s just not the same as having a pile of best-sellers in the window of Waterstones or Barnes and Noble. Your book is there online for a million readers, but somehow…. they haven’t found it yet.
If you’re happy following this theme you might like to read my piece on the much-viewed blog Huffington Post.
Just found out that four of my books are on sale at eBay: my novel The Camel Trail, and three books on food. If any of you want to pick up a book for 99p - £6, it’s a bargain. Just google Judy Jackson eBay and you’ll find the details.
By the way, authors get nothing from sales like this, but that’s not the point. Last week someone came by my house and looked through my collection of hundreds of cookbooks, looking for a present for a young friend. I ended up showing her a copy of my step-by-step picture cookbook which came out some time ago. Instead of ordering one of the others (by more famous writers) she ended up choosing that. The two hour chat and her final choice gave me more pleasure than the few pounds I made from it.
Last week at a lunch party we were treated to a quiz. Before we sat down we were invited to identify half a dozen spices - all tantalisingly familiar, but hard to recognize. We began the meal with a starter of an ultra-modern salad studded with a dozen bright ingredients. Then came traditional salt beef and tongue - pink and succulent. In between we were invited to answer the questions. We needed to fill in the name of each state on a blank map of the USA; then we were quizzed on where we would find various statues in London and whether we could name all the members of the EU.
The man in the Armchair Kitchen and I got poor results! We’re not at all clever. This reminds me never to laugh at the ignorance of others. But of course we do!
A reporter was speaking to the US basketball star, Shaquille O’Neal, about his recent visit to Athens. “Did you visit the Parthenon during your trip to Greece?”
O’Neal replied “I can’t really remember the names of the clubs we went to.”